30 Years Old

I turned 30 years old.

Most of my friends are already 30, so much of the drama around "turning 30" had dissipated. However, there was a nervousness which grew as the date drew closer. A time of reflection, a time to think of the coming decade and the one that is coming to an end.

I started my 20s as a sophomore in college. I knew how I wanted to spend my 20th birthday. With my very best friend of a year and a half, Casey. We would go for sushi, the two of us.

I had gone out the previous week and bought a birthday outfit. A shiny magenta mini skirt (what was I thinking??). As I leaned over the sink applying my eyeliner, I realized that I was very excited for the evening. Like, butterflies in tummy excited. I was so excited to spend the evening with Casey, though I spent essentially all day every day with him aside from classtime. I realized that I was excited because it felt like a date, and I surprised myself in enjoying the feeling.

We glowed through dinner, too young for sake, but old enough to be having a wonderful dinner out. Walking across the parking lot, full of wasabi and veggie sushi, feeling a warm glow, our romance began.

That was ten years ago. So much a part of thinking of the past ten years involves thinking about my time with Casey. How we bounced from place to place, how we wondered if we could align our locations, our visions of personal growth, our worlds. Then, how those questions dropped away in secure commitment. How good it feels to know that we are the lucky few. We are the ones who have found our match, who have learned how to grow with one another, who look forward to watching one another age and change. We are each other's favorite. We feel how fortunate we are.

Wes saying "Happy Birthday, Mommy"

In my twenties I was in college. I was steeped in philosophy, literature, and Buddhism. I wrote a thesis and graduated. I backpacked in Europe with Casey for three months on a shoestring (or less). I worked for a finance firm in San Francisco. I started training as a Montessori teacher. I lived in a tent on a farm and then upgraded to an adorable cob house with no running water. I researched a film documentary. I went to France on business. I finished an MBA in Sustainable Business. I learned Transcendental Meditation and lived in a meditating community. I moved back to California and found a home in Petaluma. I had two babies. I stayed home to watch them grow.

Perhaps the thirties will entail less bouncing around, living in fewer locales (until Petaluma we''d never been anywhere two straight years). But, there are many adventures to be had. I look forward to seeing the catalog in a decade--when we have a middle schooler in the house (whoa).

Clean!